verb: to think about problems or unpleasant things that may occur in a way that makes you feel unhappy or anxious; noun: a problem that makes you feel unhappy or anxious; a feeling of being unhappy or anxious about something
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Worry in and of itself may seem the least of our worries when weighed against health concerns, the cost of living, friends’ and family’s welfare, the environment, the national crime rate or war; but if you stop and consider it, you may find worry the most worrying thing of all…
When we worry, we make ourselves upset, lose sleep and can even become anxious or depressed. Why? WhWhyy give yourself such an unpleasant experience over something that may never happen? What’s the upside?
Fortunately, as is true of a great many things, worries exist internally. While our worries may be inspired by external factors, they haven’t actually happened yet. Maybe they never will. At this point, it’s all in your mind. The reason I say this is fortunate is that, with enough discipline, they’re within our control. I know loads of people say “I can’t stop worrying” – I’ve said it myself many times over the years – and it’s true when we say it. It’s true because we make it true.
The subconscious mind is a remarkable thing: it governs our internal worlds. It’s also very literal. Whatever you – your conscious self – say to yourself about yourself, your subconscious takes as gospel.
Please don’t misunderstand me: I’m not saying that you will instantly go from hating to loving milk over a throwaway comment. I’m saying that if you consistently affirm a message you will come to believe that message over time – even if you’re not consciously aware you’re doing it. So when people tell you to stop worrying and you say “I can’t” every time, you end up in a situation where you really can’t stop worrying!
Countless people, myself included, have spent a very long time giving themselves very unhelpful messages without even knowing. How do you fix that? How do you stop worrying when you can’t stop worrying?
As is often the way, the simple answer is the best one: tell yourself the opposite. Give your subconscious the opposite message. It has to come from you because it’s your mind. Bob Marley or Timon and Pumbaa might have the right idea, but they don’t get a say in who you are. You decide that. You have to be the one who says “I’m not worried”, “I don’t worry” or “I’m not a worrier” instead of “I can’t stop worrying”. Of course you’ll be lying through your teeth at first, but the more you say it, the more true it will become – just stick with it. Commit to it. Be consistent. Over time, you’ll find you’re worrying less and less until, eventually, you don’t worry at all! No more stressing over things that might never happen. No more sleepless nights…
I hope this has been of some interest or use to you, dear reader, and I wish you nothing but the best: whether or not you worry – or think – too much!
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